Hello Fans!
I will now tell you about the v totes ridic time I am having in Polonia!
On my way back from my parent's car tonight, I saw a few youths (around 5) in amazing Adidas tear-away outfits(each guy had a different color! It's hard to have 5 distinct colors when you think about it!) standing in front of a (very) old Polish car with open doors blasting dance music while drinking one (1) beer between each other and smoking cigarettes, looking strangely threatening (they couldn't be more than 16), prolly cause it was after midnight. IT WAS AWESOME, though I was completely sure that we wouldn't make it upstairs without stab-wounds.
Well, otherwise, Poland is actually pretty safe and nice now, and people in general have more money...gone are the days of crazy drunk people laying around the street asking to buy them more vodka. Yesterday I was in Warsaw walking around, otherwise I've been around my home town (which is EXTREMELY boring), and went to visit my grandparent's grave, which was a good thing to do. I'm pretty much hanging out with my parents during the day, and then my sinful brother during the evenings, though he is not at all scandalous, and everything here closes at 9pm, so we sit in his or my parent's apartment and drink tea. GOD. If I actually grew up in this town, I'd AT LEAST stand around a piece-of-shit car and share a beer (one, cause I can't afford anymore cause I'm 15) with 5 questionable characters with matching outfits (I can still hear their music outside, and it's 2am!!!). I keep telling him that he's LAME, and I ask where there are some scandalous sexually-deviant things going on, but he said that people simply drive over to Germany to do that, and he couldn't get days off work so we can't go. Then of course he asks what deviant things I have in mind, and then doesn't want to hear about it, and tells me that with my attitude, I'll end up alone (he has a boyfriend, who is equally as LAME as he is, and in my opinion, is not enough ammo to threaten me with loneliness. I mean the dude is like furniture from Ikea: useful-I-guess, but in the end disposable and replaceable).
<3
Mischka
September 27, 2007
September 26, 2007
No one needs more poppers!
Hello fans!
I, Mee-how, have been having quite a TIME. It is just so totes ridic I am not sure where to begin.
Firstly, LX has proven himself the ultimate darke vampyre, which I obviously already knew. After sleeping for 18 hours I woke up in my darkened hotel room to the sound of footsteps on broken glass, only to find LX standing in an obscene see-through cleavage shirt bloodied with some sort of injury. LX should be in a jail right now talking to all his new friends! He smiled his cruelle smile at me, yelled THE WORLD DOESN'T NEED MORE LOSERS, IT NEEDS MORE POPPERS, and jumped out the broken window, which pleased me immensely, but then I saw what he had done and now I want to hide in this closet forever. He also said something about Penelope, which sounds very suspicious, I will have to ask Onewytche about what horrible things he is doing to her, and called himself Lexi. Fans, there are hundreds of turtle heads drawn on the walls of my hotel room. Hundreds. I do not think that the staff will be pleased. Not only are they drawn on the walls, which are covered in a fake moire wallpaper--NOT CLASSY--but they are also drawn in lipstick (!) all over my bathroom mirror. He also wrote the words HOW SOON IS NOW, which is so trashy and unbelievable, and obviously it is in his serial killer writing which has made my soul grow cold. I do not even know what to do, so I am re-reading Kafka, per UGE.
Much more depraved and kayoot, I went to a sex shoppe for a man corset fitting so I can be sex-xy for the next Seatbelt Meetup. Every girl working there was so attractive and dead inside, and they all told me I was so slim which obviously pleased me to no end. My corset laces all the way up my back and neck and is so restrictive, it is just like having someone almost crush me to death but let me live instead. Yessse!
I went out to this one goth club by myself and it was so darke and everyone was so much more in the SCENE than at NEO, obviously. I felt so pleased that I re-shaved my head so I could be reborn into the scene along with every other guy with a shaved head. No one told me I had pretty eyes--TRASHY--but I did take my shirt off and sweat so much I felt like a terrible American. There were two kayoot girls who live together who wanted to "hang out" but they were so drunk I don't think they even remember their own names today.
What else? Oh let me think oh I got MUGGED! Obviously I was wearing my corset and walking down the street thinking about the terrible turtle heads when I hear this strange noise behind me. Of course I assume it is LX, but instead it was a very ugly man in a track suit and he backed me up against a wall--NOT SEX-XY--and took my wallet. Fortunately my fake Polish car insurance "card" and my passport were in the hotel but now I might look kind of tough since I have been roughed up. I have taken so many pictures of myself, I can't wait to put them up on Facebook.
I will have to blog about going back to Poland later. It is something else!
<3
Mischka
I, Mee-how, have been having quite a TIME. It is just so totes ridic I am not sure where to begin.
Firstly, LX has proven himself the ultimate darke vampyre, which I obviously already knew. After sleeping for 18 hours I woke up in my darkened hotel room to the sound of footsteps on broken glass, only to find LX standing in an obscene see-through cleavage shirt bloodied with some sort of injury. LX should be in a jail right now talking to all his new friends! He smiled his cruelle smile at me, yelled THE WORLD DOESN'T NEED MORE LOSERS, IT NEEDS MORE POPPERS, and jumped out the broken window, which pleased me immensely, but then I saw what he had done and now I want to hide in this closet forever. He also said something about Penelope, which sounds very suspicious, I will have to ask Onewytche about what horrible things he is doing to her, and called himself Lexi. Fans, there are hundreds of turtle heads drawn on the walls of my hotel room. Hundreds. I do not think that the staff will be pleased. Not only are they drawn on the walls, which are covered in a fake moire wallpaper--NOT CLASSY--but they are also drawn in lipstick (!) all over my bathroom mirror. He also wrote the words HOW SOON IS NOW, which is so trashy and unbelievable, and obviously it is in his serial killer writing which has made my soul grow cold. I do not even know what to do, so I am re-reading Kafka, per UGE.
Much more depraved and kayoot, I went to a sex shoppe for a man corset fitting so I can be sex-xy for the next Seatbelt Meetup. Every girl working there was so attractive and dead inside, and they all told me I was so slim which obviously pleased me to no end. My corset laces all the way up my back and neck and is so restrictive, it is just like having someone almost crush me to death but let me live instead. Yessse!
I went out to this one goth club by myself and it was so darke and everyone was so much more in the SCENE than at NEO, obviously. I felt so pleased that I re-shaved my head so I could be reborn into the scene along with every other guy with a shaved head. No one told me I had pretty eyes--TRASHY--but I did take my shirt off and sweat so much I felt like a terrible American. There were two kayoot girls who live together who wanted to "hang out" but they were so drunk I don't think they even remember their own names today.
What else? Oh let me think oh I got MUGGED! Obviously I was wearing my corset and walking down the street thinking about the terrible turtle heads when I hear this strange noise behind me. Of course I assume it is LX, but instead it was a very ugly man in a track suit and he backed me up against a wall--NOT SEX-XY--and took my wallet. Fortunately my fake Polish car insurance "card" and my passport were in the hotel but now I might look kind of tough since I have been roughed up. I have taken so many pictures of myself, I can't wait to put them up on Facebook.
I will have to blog about going back to Poland later. It is something else!
<3
Mischka
September 18, 2007
A harrowing journey...
Hello fans!
I am writing this from the airport in Londre as I wait for my taxi to whisk me to my hotel. Taxis in London are cruel and black. It is V obscene.
The trip here was quite a trial for many terrible reasons. First of all, I nearly missed my flight! I have been suffering from a terrible brain fever for the past several days and have been in a near comatose state so I didn't wake up until 6pm and my flight was at 8! Luckily I had packed my suitcase before I went to bed, so after a shower and a quick bite to eat (plain Cheerios, strawberry Activia yogurt and a passion mango sunrise tea) I was out the door!
My suitcase seemed unnaturally heavy, which was odd because all I had packed was a single black sweater and pair of black pants and a toothbrush (black). Figuring it was merely due to my weakened state, I struggled to hail a cab. Once I arrived at the airport, I rushed to my gate as quickly as possible. The woman working the x-ray machine seemed distracted by picking things out from under her acryllic nails (so sinful looking) but it meant I got through faster so I didn't mind.
I got to my gate just as they were shutting the door to the plane. I rushed to my seat and we were on our way.
Now during most plane rides, I entertain myself by reading from a favorite book, which 99% of the time is The Collected Works of Franz Kafka. As I was rereading the Trial for the 217th time and going over some notes I had made in the margins during a prior reading, I heard a banging sound coming from the overhead luggage compartment where I had stowed my bag. It was V strange.
Unable to ignore the infernal clamor, I got out of my seat and opened the bin. My suitcase fell to the floor (and nearly crushed me!) Something was trying to get out of it! As a crowd gathered around me, I opened it and the most bone chilling site greeted me: LX contorted like some sort of hellish human pretzel.
As he unfolded himself before the unbelieving crowd he exclaimed "HEY BUSTER BROWN! YOU AND I NEED TO TALK SO I STOWED AWAY IN YOUR BAG! I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND!"
The stewardesses and captain were all very angry at me and I was forced to sit in ChibiLX's lap for the rest of 7 hour flight! It was the WORST. He insisted I read my book to him out loud. I was humiliated and not in a sexy way!
Things worked out for the best though. As soon as we disembarked from the plane, a group of British police officers (Bobbies!) surrounded LX and beat him into submission with their big black clubs. As they dragged him away, LX turned to face me and with a wild light in his eye yelled "I GUESS THESE FELLOWS WANT TO CHAT! I'LL MEET UP WITH YOU LATER, BUCKO!"
At that point I screamed and the police officers subdued LX with a taser. After collecting myself I went to buy a Coffee and that brings up to the current moment.
I hope the door on my hotel room has a dead-bolt or better yet, a walk-in closet I can sleep in. Pray for me Mee-how, dear readers. I do not want ChibiLX to consume my brain.
I am writing this from the airport in Londre as I wait for my taxi to whisk me to my hotel. Taxis in London are cruel and black. It is V obscene.
The trip here was quite a trial for many terrible reasons. First of all, I nearly missed my flight! I have been suffering from a terrible brain fever for the past several days and have been in a near comatose state so I didn't wake up until 6pm and my flight was at 8! Luckily I had packed my suitcase before I went to bed, so after a shower and a quick bite to eat (plain Cheerios, strawberry Activia yogurt and a passion mango sunrise tea) I was out the door!
My suitcase seemed unnaturally heavy, which was odd because all I had packed was a single black sweater and pair of black pants and a toothbrush (black). Figuring it was merely due to my weakened state, I struggled to hail a cab. Once I arrived at the airport, I rushed to my gate as quickly as possible. The woman working the x-ray machine seemed distracted by picking things out from under her acryllic nails (so sinful looking) but it meant I got through faster so I didn't mind.
I got to my gate just as they were shutting the door to the plane. I rushed to my seat and we were on our way.
Now during most plane rides, I entertain myself by reading from a favorite book, which 99% of the time is The Collected Works of Franz Kafka. As I was rereading the Trial for the 217th time and going over some notes I had made in the margins during a prior reading, I heard a banging sound coming from the overhead luggage compartment where I had stowed my bag. It was V strange.
Unable to ignore the infernal clamor, I got out of my seat and opened the bin. My suitcase fell to the floor (and nearly crushed me!) Something was trying to get out of it! As a crowd gathered around me, I opened it and the most bone chilling site greeted me: LX contorted like some sort of hellish human pretzel.
As he unfolded himself before the unbelieving crowd he exclaimed "HEY BUSTER BROWN! YOU AND I NEED TO TALK SO I STOWED AWAY IN YOUR BAG! I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND!"
The stewardesses and captain were all very angry at me and I was forced to sit in ChibiLX's lap for the rest of 7 hour flight! It was the WORST. He insisted I read my book to him out loud. I was humiliated and not in a sexy way!
Things worked out for the best though. As soon as we disembarked from the plane, a group of British police officers (Bobbies!) surrounded LX and beat him into submission with their big black clubs. As they dragged him away, LX turned to face me and with a wild light in his eye yelled "I GUESS THESE FELLOWS WANT TO CHAT! I'LL MEET UP WITH YOU LATER, BUCKO!"
At that point I screamed and the police officers subdued LX with a taser. After collecting myself I went to buy a Coffee and that brings up to the current moment.
I hope the door on my hotel room has a dead-bolt or better yet, a walk-in closet I can sleep in. Pray for me Mee-how, dear readers. I do not want ChibiLX to consume my brain.
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