Cheaptickets e-mailed me today and was like,
Dr. Mr. Micheal Janigki,
Please call immediately regarding your Air India flight.
Regards,
The Cheaptickets Team
This made me cringe a bit, but after calling their tech support in India and then China, they "straightened it all out." Check this, fans:
Cheaptickets: "Oh yes, Mr Ganiduekseigj, e-mail sent was because identification you need airport, yes?"
Me: "WHAT?!"
Cheaptickets: "Oh, we transfer manager."
Me: "OK, go ahead and transfer him."
Another person came on, and it sounded so faint...like they were somewhere in Japan or something...
Cheaptickets manager: "The e-mail was sent because you should bring identification when you get on the flight, like a driver's license or a valid state ID."
Me: "Ummm, isn't it an international flight? Don't I need a passport anyway?"
Cheaptickets manager: "Ticket was sent e-mail, Mr. Kgwakfadsf, thank you."
I swear, that "plane" is going to take me to an "Outer Limits" TV episode.
<3,
UK PM
November 9, 2007
October 30, 2007
Meow!
Hello fans!
I hope all of you have been depraved and scandalous lately because obviously I have! I cannot even believe the debauchery that ensued in a single weekend. Ok here goes:
So Friday was SOMETHING ELSE because onewytche took me to Julius Meinl where obviously Rob had the most decadent dessert in existence and then we went to see Control. Joy Division is whevs and I do not like movies about rock stars because I don't want to feel sorry for them but the movie was pretty and tragick and depressing and did not put anyone in a good light which made me pleased. Things picked up when we got to @tmosphere, obviously, because first of all there was a MALE STRIPPER, wearing brightly colored underwear that LX totes has. I got A beer, which was too expensive but I guess you pay for the entertainment OR SOMETHING, and we sat down where to our surprise we were accosted by some sinful teens from the suburbs! One girl we will call Blockhead, the other girl is just A Girl, and then there was Close Talker guy and 35 year old guy. 35 year old guy said I had pretty eyes aaaaaaaaa but would NOT buy me a drink! I told him I had moved to the US 3 years ago and he still would not buy me one! RUDE! Blockhead, A Girl, and Close Talker were all high on crystal meth or something else illicit and would not leave us alone which was amazing and terrible! I think they were 17 maybe.
Oh also, it was a little bit rainy and cold and all of us were wearing hooded sweatshirts under jackets and mine was a trench coat. Yessss! I am so core!
Saturday was the most sex-xy. Onewytche got me a cat mask and made me wear it with my black sinful bondage pants and a tight black t-shirt and my trench coat. Grrr now I know why they call me "meow." We went to a party at Mikey's and I would like to say that is all I can remember but NO it is all coming back to me. It started out pretty whatever, there were not that many people there and we took lots of fantastic pictures in front of the sad wolf blanket that was hanging over the front door. I was introduced to Hot Irish Guy who was wearing a uniform and my mind immediately said, "Ooooh bad news! He is trouble!" and also Mikey's roommates and a bunch of other slutty people such as the tragick attempt at Betty Paige who should have had on more clothes than anyone but was wearing almost none aaaaaaa! The girl whose terrible roommate I drove home on New Year's was there, and she remembered that she owed me like 10 drinks but she only mixed me one. Grrrr.
The wolf blanket is key because all the decadence of the night happened behind it. Erika made out with Mikey and then ran away, so Rob and I had to run after her and I lost my keys. Rob also made out with Jon Benet who is Mikey's roommate at the same time. We went back with Erika and I got a bit too drunk and MADE OUT WITH A MUMMY who is also Mikey's roommate! I wanted pretty much anyone to make out with me, I even gave Mikey a lapdance (Mikey doesn't ask for it) and then finally Erika was just like, DO IT MIKE. The best part is that the new Radiohead song that I like was playing, it is called "15 step" and it is about DEATH and get this: it has the lyrics "did the cat get your tongue?" aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! It made up for no one buying me a drink the night before, plus he is a good kisser. mmmmmmm so depraved.
Then we went to Golden Nugget. Next time I will make out with all the roommates and/or Nicke, who pedaled tragically away on his huge bicycle at the end of the night. Too bad LX wasn't there to whip him into shape.
Also, have you guys ever heard of a Sexy Bee? "Bzzzzz bzzzzz I'm a sex-xy bee and I'm going to sting you!"
<3,
mee-how
I hope all of you have been depraved and scandalous lately because obviously I have! I cannot even believe the debauchery that ensued in a single weekend. Ok here goes:
So Friday was SOMETHING ELSE because onewytche took me to Julius Meinl where obviously Rob had the most decadent dessert in existence and then we went to see Control. Joy Division is whevs and I do not like movies about rock stars because I don't want to feel sorry for them but the movie was pretty and tragick and depressing and did not put anyone in a good light which made me pleased. Things picked up when we got to @tmosphere, obviously, because first of all there was a MALE STRIPPER, wearing brightly colored underwear that LX totes has. I got A beer, which was too expensive but I guess you pay for the entertainment OR SOMETHING, and we sat down where to our surprise we were accosted by some sinful teens from the suburbs! One girl we will call Blockhead, the other girl is just A Girl, and then there was Close Talker guy and 35 year old guy. 35 year old guy said I had pretty eyes aaaaaaaaa but would NOT buy me a drink! I told him I had moved to the US 3 years ago and he still would not buy me one! RUDE! Blockhead, A Girl, and Close Talker were all high on crystal meth or something else illicit and would not leave us alone which was amazing and terrible! I think they were 17 maybe.
Oh also, it was a little bit rainy and cold and all of us were wearing hooded sweatshirts under jackets and mine was a trench coat. Yessss! I am so core!
Saturday was the most sex-xy. Onewytche got me a cat mask and made me wear it with my black sinful bondage pants and a tight black t-shirt and my trench coat. Grrr now I know why they call me "meow." We went to a party at Mikey's and I would like to say that is all I can remember but NO it is all coming back to me. It started out pretty whatever, there were not that many people there and we took lots of fantastic pictures in front of the sad wolf blanket that was hanging over the front door. I was introduced to Hot Irish Guy who was wearing a uniform and my mind immediately said, "Ooooh bad news! He is trouble!" and also Mikey's roommates and a bunch of other slutty people such as the tragick attempt at Betty Paige who should have had on more clothes than anyone but was wearing almost none aaaaaaa! The girl whose terrible roommate I drove home on New Year's was there, and she remembered that she owed me like 10 drinks but she only mixed me one. Grrrr.
The wolf blanket is key because all the decadence of the night happened behind it. Erika made out with Mikey and then ran away, so Rob and I had to run after her and I lost my keys. Rob also made out with Jon Benet who is Mikey's roommate at the same time. We went back with Erika and I got a bit too drunk and MADE OUT WITH A MUMMY who is also Mikey's roommate! I wanted pretty much anyone to make out with me, I even gave Mikey a lapdance (Mikey doesn't ask for it) and then finally Erika was just like, DO IT MIKE. The best part is that the new Radiohead song that I like was playing, it is called "15 step" and it is about DEATH and get this: it has the lyrics "did the cat get your tongue?" aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! It made up for no one buying me a drink the night before, plus he is a good kisser. mmmmmmm so depraved.
Then we went to Golden Nugget. Next time I will make out with all the roommates and/or Nicke, who pedaled tragically away on his huge bicycle at the end of the night. Too bad LX wasn't there to whip him into shape.
Also, have you guys ever heard of a Sexy Bee? "Bzzzzz bzzzzz I'm a sex-xy bee and I'm going to sting you!"
<3,
mee-how
September 27, 2007
Hello Fans!
I will now tell you about the v totes ridic time I am having in Polonia!
On my way back from my parent's car tonight, I saw a few youths (around 5) in amazing Adidas tear-away outfits(each guy had a different color! It's hard to have 5 distinct colors when you think about it!) standing in front of a (very) old Polish car with open doors blasting dance music while drinking one (1) beer between each other and smoking cigarettes, looking strangely threatening (they couldn't be more than 16), prolly cause it was after midnight. IT WAS AWESOME, though I was completely sure that we wouldn't make it upstairs without stab-wounds.
Well, otherwise, Poland is actually pretty safe and nice now, and people in general have more money...gone are the days of crazy drunk people laying around the street asking to buy them more vodka. Yesterday I was in Warsaw walking around, otherwise I've been around my home town (which is EXTREMELY boring), and went to visit my grandparent's grave, which was a good thing to do. I'm pretty much hanging out with my parents during the day, and then my sinful brother during the evenings, though he is not at all scandalous, and everything here closes at 9pm, so we sit in his or my parent's apartment and drink tea. GOD. If I actually grew up in this town, I'd AT LEAST stand around a piece-of-shit car and share a beer (one, cause I can't afford anymore cause I'm 15) with 5 questionable characters with matching outfits (I can still hear their music outside, and it's 2am!!!). I keep telling him that he's LAME, and I ask where there are some scandalous sexually-deviant things going on, but he said that people simply drive over to Germany to do that, and he couldn't get days off work so we can't go. Then of course he asks what deviant things I have in mind, and then doesn't want to hear about it, and tells me that with my attitude, I'll end up alone (he has a boyfriend, who is equally as LAME as he is, and in my opinion, is not enough ammo to threaten me with loneliness. I mean the dude is like furniture from Ikea: useful-I-guess, but in the end disposable and replaceable).
<3
Mischka
I will now tell you about the v totes ridic time I am having in Polonia!
On my way back from my parent's car tonight, I saw a few youths (around 5) in amazing Adidas tear-away outfits(each guy had a different color! It's hard to have 5 distinct colors when you think about it!) standing in front of a (very) old Polish car with open doors blasting dance music while drinking one (1) beer between each other and smoking cigarettes, looking strangely threatening (they couldn't be more than 16), prolly cause it was after midnight. IT WAS AWESOME, though I was completely sure that we wouldn't make it upstairs without stab-wounds.
Well, otherwise, Poland is actually pretty safe and nice now, and people in general have more money...gone are the days of crazy drunk people laying around the street asking to buy them more vodka. Yesterday I was in Warsaw walking around, otherwise I've been around my home town (which is EXTREMELY boring), and went to visit my grandparent's grave, which was a good thing to do. I'm pretty much hanging out with my parents during the day, and then my sinful brother during the evenings, though he is not at all scandalous, and everything here closes at 9pm, so we sit in his or my parent's apartment and drink tea. GOD. If I actually grew up in this town, I'd AT LEAST stand around a piece-of-shit car and share a beer (one, cause I can't afford anymore cause I'm 15) with 5 questionable characters with matching outfits (I can still hear their music outside, and it's 2am!!!). I keep telling him that he's LAME, and I ask where there are some scandalous sexually-deviant things going on, but he said that people simply drive over to Germany to do that, and he couldn't get days off work so we can't go. Then of course he asks what deviant things I have in mind, and then doesn't want to hear about it, and tells me that with my attitude, I'll end up alone (he has a boyfriend, who is equally as LAME as he is, and in my opinion, is not enough ammo to threaten me with loneliness. I mean the dude is like furniture from Ikea: useful-I-guess, but in the end disposable and replaceable).
<3
Mischka
September 26, 2007
No one needs more poppers!
Hello fans!
I, Mee-how, have been having quite a TIME. It is just so totes ridic I am not sure where to begin.
Firstly, LX has proven himself the ultimate darke vampyre, which I obviously already knew. After sleeping for 18 hours I woke up in my darkened hotel room to the sound of footsteps on broken glass, only to find LX standing in an obscene see-through cleavage shirt bloodied with some sort of injury. LX should be in a jail right now talking to all his new friends! He smiled his cruelle smile at me, yelled THE WORLD DOESN'T NEED MORE LOSERS, IT NEEDS MORE POPPERS, and jumped out the broken window, which pleased me immensely, but then I saw what he had done and now I want to hide in this closet forever. He also said something about Penelope, which sounds very suspicious, I will have to ask Onewytche about what horrible things he is doing to her, and called himself Lexi. Fans, there are hundreds of turtle heads drawn on the walls of my hotel room. Hundreds. I do not think that the staff will be pleased. Not only are they drawn on the walls, which are covered in a fake moire wallpaper--NOT CLASSY--but they are also drawn in lipstick (!) all over my bathroom mirror. He also wrote the words HOW SOON IS NOW, which is so trashy and unbelievable, and obviously it is in his serial killer writing which has made my soul grow cold. I do not even know what to do, so I am re-reading Kafka, per UGE.
Much more depraved and kayoot, I went to a sex shoppe for a man corset fitting so I can be sex-xy for the next Seatbelt Meetup. Every girl working there was so attractive and dead inside, and they all told me I was so slim which obviously pleased me to no end. My corset laces all the way up my back and neck and is so restrictive, it is just like having someone almost crush me to death but let me live instead. Yessse!
I went out to this one goth club by myself and it was so darke and everyone was so much more in the SCENE than at NEO, obviously. I felt so pleased that I re-shaved my head so I could be reborn into the scene along with every other guy with a shaved head. No one told me I had pretty eyes--TRASHY--but I did take my shirt off and sweat so much I felt like a terrible American. There were two kayoot girls who live together who wanted to "hang out" but they were so drunk I don't think they even remember their own names today.
What else? Oh let me think oh I got MUGGED! Obviously I was wearing my corset and walking down the street thinking about the terrible turtle heads when I hear this strange noise behind me. Of course I assume it is LX, but instead it was a very ugly man in a track suit and he backed me up against a wall--NOT SEX-XY--and took my wallet. Fortunately my fake Polish car insurance "card" and my passport were in the hotel but now I might look kind of tough since I have been roughed up. I have taken so many pictures of myself, I can't wait to put them up on Facebook.
I will have to blog about going back to Poland later. It is something else!
<3
Mischka
I, Mee-how, have been having quite a TIME. It is just so totes ridic I am not sure where to begin.
Firstly, LX has proven himself the ultimate darke vampyre, which I obviously already knew. After sleeping for 18 hours I woke up in my darkened hotel room to the sound of footsteps on broken glass, only to find LX standing in an obscene see-through cleavage shirt bloodied with some sort of injury. LX should be in a jail right now talking to all his new friends! He smiled his cruelle smile at me, yelled THE WORLD DOESN'T NEED MORE LOSERS, IT NEEDS MORE POPPERS, and jumped out the broken window, which pleased me immensely, but then I saw what he had done and now I want to hide in this closet forever. He also said something about Penelope, which sounds very suspicious, I will have to ask Onewytche about what horrible things he is doing to her, and called himself Lexi. Fans, there are hundreds of turtle heads drawn on the walls of my hotel room. Hundreds. I do not think that the staff will be pleased. Not only are they drawn on the walls, which are covered in a fake moire wallpaper--NOT CLASSY--but they are also drawn in lipstick (!) all over my bathroom mirror. He also wrote the words HOW SOON IS NOW, which is so trashy and unbelievable, and obviously it is in his serial killer writing which has made my soul grow cold. I do not even know what to do, so I am re-reading Kafka, per UGE.
Much more depraved and kayoot, I went to a sex shoppe for a man corset fitting so I can be sex-xy for the next Seatbelt Meetup. Every girl working there was so attractive and dead inside, and they all told me I was so slim which obviously pleased me to no end. My corset laces all the way up my back and neck and is so restrictive, it is just like having someone almost crush me to death but let me live instead. Yessse!
I went out to this one goth club by myself and it was so darke and everyone was so much more in the SCENE than at NEO, obviously. I felt so pleased that I re-shaved my head so I could be reborn into the scene along with every other guy with a shaved head. No one told me I had pretty eyes--TRASHY--but I did take my shirt off and sweat so much I felt like a terrible American. There were two kayoot girls who live together who wanted to "hang out" but they were so drunk I don't think they even remember their own names today.
What else? Oh let me think oh I got MUGGED! Obviously I was wearing my corset and walking down the street thinking about the terrible turtle heads when I hear this strange noise behind me. Of course I assume it is LX, but instead it was a very ugly man in a track suit and he backed me up against a wall--NOT SEX-XY--and took my wallet. Fortunately my fake Polish car insurance "card" and my passport were in the hotel but now I might look kind of tough since I have been roughed up. I have taken so many pictures of myself, I can't wait to put them up on Facebook.
I will have to blog about going back to Poland later. It is something else!
<3
Mischka
September 18, 2007
A harrowing journey...
Hello fans!
I am writing this from the airport in Londre as I wait for my taxi to whisk me to my hotel. Taxis in London are cruel and black. It is V obscene.
The trip here was quite a trial for many terrible reasons. First of all, I nearly missed my flight! I have been suffering from a terrible brain fever for the past several days and have been in a near comatose state so I didn't wake up until 6pm and my flight was at 8! Luckily I had packed my suitcase before I went to bed, so after a shower and a quick bite to eat (plain Cheerios, strawberry Activia yogurt and a passion mango sunrise tea) I was out the door!
My suitcase seemed unnaturally heavy, which was odd because all I had packed was a single black sweater and pair of black pants and a toothbrush (black). Figuring it was merely due to my weakened state, I struggled to hail a cab. Once I arrived at the airport, I rushed to my gate as quickly as possible. The woman working the x-ray machine seemed distracted by picking things out from under her acryllic nails (so sinful looking) but it meant I got through faster so I didn't mind.
I got to my gate just as they were shutting the door to the plane. I rushed to my seat and we were on our way.
Now during most plane rides, I entertain myself by reading from a favorite book, which 99% of the time is The Collected Works of Franz Kafka. As I was rereading the Trial for the 217th time and going over some notes I had made in the margins during a prior reading, I heard a banging sound coming from the overhead luggage compartment where I had stowed my bag. It was V strange.
Unable to ignore the infernal clamor, I got out of my seat and opened the bin. My suitcase fell to the floor (and nearly crushed me!) Something was trying to get out of it! As a crowd gathered around me, I opened it and the most bone chilling site greeted me: LX contorted like some sort of hellish human pretzel.
As he unfolded himself before the unbelieving crowd he exclaimed "HEY BUSTER BROWN! YOU AND I NEED TO TALK SO I STOWED AWAY IN YOUR BAG! I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND!"
The stewardesses and captain were all very angry at me and I was forced to sit in ChibiLX's lap for the rest of 7 hour flight! It was the WORST. He insisted I read my book to him out loud. I was humiliated and not in a sexy way!
Things worked out for the best though. As soon as we disembarked from the plane, a group of British police officers (Bobbies!) surrounded LX and beat him into submission with their big black clubs. As they dragged him away, LX turned to face me and with a wild light in his eye yelled "I GUESS THESE FELLOWS WANT TO CHAT! I'LL MEET UP WITH YOU LATER, BUCKO!"
At that point I screamed and the police officers subdued LX with a taser. After collecting myself I went to buy a Coffee and that brings up to the current moment.
I hope the door on my hotel room has a dead-bolt or better yet, a walk-in closet I can sleep in. Pray for me Mee-how, dear readers. I do not want ChibiLX to consume my brain.
I am writing this from the airport in Londre as I wait for my taxi to whisk me to my hotel. Taxis in London are cruel and black. It is V obscene.
The trip here was quite a trial for many terrible reasons. First of all, I nearly missed my flight! I have been suffering from a terrible brain fever for the past several days and have been in a near comatose state so I didn't wake up until 6pm and my flight was at 8! Luckily I had packed my suitcase before I went to bed, so after a shower and a quick bite to eat (plain Cheerios, strawberry Activia yogurt and a passion mango sunrise tea) I was out the door!
My suitcase seemed unnaturally heavy, which was odd because all I had packed was a single black sweater and pair of black pants and a toothbrush (black). Figuring it was merely due to my weakened state, I struggled to hail a cab. Once I arrived at the airport, I rushed to my gate as quickly as possible. The woman working the x-ray machine seemed distracted by picking things out from under her acryllic nails (so sinful looking) but it meant I got through faster so I didn't mind.
I got to my gate just as they were shutting the door to the plane. I rushed to my seat and we were on our way.
Now during most plane rides, I entertain myself by reading from a favorite book, which 99% of the time is The Collected Works of Franz Kafka. As I was rereading the Trial for the 217th time and going over some notes I had made in the margins during a prior reading, I heard a banging sound coming from the overhead luggage compartment where I had stowed my bag. It was V strange.
Unable to ignore the infernal clamor, I got out of my seat and opened the bin. My suitcase fell to the floor (and nearly crushed me!) Something was trying to get out of it! As a crowd gathered around me, I opened it and the most bone chilling site greeted me: LX contorted like some sort of hellish human pretzel.
As he unfolded himself before the unbelieving crowd he exclaimed "HEY BUSTER BROWN! YOU AND I NEED TO TALK SO I STOWED AWAY IN YOUR BAG! I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND!"
The stewardesses and captain were all very angry at me and I was forced to sit in ChibiLX's lap for the rest of 7 hour flight! It was the WORST. He insisted I read my book to him out loud. I was humiliated and not in a sexy way!
Things worked out for the best though. As soon as we disembarked from the plane, a group of British police officers (Bobbies!) surrounded LX and beat him into submission with their big black clubs. As they dragged him away, LX turned to face me and with a wild light in his eye yelled "I GUESS THESE FELLOWS WANT TO CHAT! I'LL MEET UP WITH YOU LATER, BUCKO!"
At that point I screamed and the police officers subdued LX with a taser. After collecting myself I went to buy a Coffee and that brings up to the current moment.
I hope the door on my hotel room has a dead-bolt or better yet, a walk-in closet I can sleep in. Pray for me Mee-how, dear readers. I do not want ChibiLX to consume my brain.
July 9, 2007
He was no more... than a baby then...
Hello fans!
Today I have been considering my tattoo options. After hearing Laura sing "Edge of Seventeen" this Saturday, I must must get a tattoo of that song! I would like the lettering of "Edge of Seventeen" to be in a very decadent font and there will be a cruelle white dove as well. Tragick! It will be on the inside of my arm.
Also, I have been informed of the fantastic idea of a front-and-back tattoo; perhaps I will get heart outline with a blue lightning bolt through it. It will be on both my chest and back and be so cruelle. I must take lots of dramatic, stark photos with no shirt on. Yessss!
<3,
mee-how
Today I have been considering my tattoo options. After hearing Laura sing "Edge of Seventeen" this Saturday, I must must get a tattoo of that song! I would like the lettering of "Edge of Seventeen" to be in a very decadent font and there will be a cruelle white dove as well. Tragick! It will be on the inside of my arm.
Also, I have been informed of the fantastic idea of a front-and-back tattoo; perhaps I will get heart outline with a blue lightning bolt through it. It will be on both my chest and back and be so cruelle. I must take lots of dramatic, stark photos with no shirt on. Yessss!
<3,
mee-how
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